Self-Sabotage

I had a bad weekend. An off-plan weekend. Despite my resolve to do something active at some point on the weekend, I did nothing. I didn’t even go riding, even though we had some unseasonably warm weather today. Yesterday I made the mistake of going off to Target before having lunch, so on the way home I was so hungry that I talked myself into stopping at a pizza place and getting a sub sandwich to bring home for lunch. To make up for it, I made sure that I ate the lightest Jenny Craig meal that I had in the freezer last night for dinner and didn’t “volumize” it at all, but still, I’m sure the damage was already done. Today I’ve stuck completely on plan, except for the not exercising thing. At least I didn’t screw the food up though. This is probably a big reason why I can’t seem to lose weight. I do everything right for most of the week, but then manage some slip-up that sabotages everything and wipes out all my good efforts for the week. It is days like this that bring back my old mantra chant, “I hate myself”. I am very conscious when I start this and always manage to nip it in the bud, knowing how non-productive it is. But it sill manages to slip out (and many times out loud) with an unsettling regularity.

I don’t know what else there really is to do, other than to get back on plan and continue on. One thing I have to say is that I think I’m smart to plan one of my training sessions for Mondays. At least I manage to start the week off on the right foot. It’s a shame that Jenny Craig weigh-in day has to be the same day, but that’s what works with my schedule the best. So, I’m trying not to beat myself up too much and just move on from my mistakes. I have to do better though, I must do better. I WILL do better.

This is my seat on the couch:



Notice how little space they leave for me. Sheesh.