ARGH! I am surrounding by sickies! Every cube surrounding mine is occupied by someone coughing and hacking away. I am the only healthy one here and I want to stay that way. Keep your germs to yourself sickos!

Am I the only one...

...who hates going to the gym on a day when you're having a good hair day? Argh!

Fashion Lesson.

Empire-waist tops and dresses seem to be in style this year (for those men out there, an empire waist is basically a faux waistline higher on the torso, usually just underneath the breasts). Now that Spring is finally here, I've seen people walking around NYC in some of these tops. Pretty. That is, if it fits. The top is all of a sudden not so cute if the waistline stretches across the middle or the top of your breasts, particularly if you are, er, well-endowed. In this case, perhaps a larger size or a different style would be in order. Of course, this is just my opinion.

Marathon Training.

There is a girl in my class who is obviously new to running. I can tell by the questions she asks and by what she wears to run in. Last night's example: cotton yoga pants and a low-cut, v-neck, cotton "fashion" t-shirt (style similar to one I might wear with nice pants in the Summer). Anyway, plenty of people in class are new to running, most are, in fact, so fine, good & dandy. She is very enthusiastic and gung ho -- great. But. I overheard her talking to the coach the other day about the NYC Marathon Lottery. As in, when she can expect to hear whether or not she's gotten in. To the Marathon. For 2004. ???!!! She is in the baby-beginner class! We've just now accomplished 10 minutes of running without a walk break. We ran like, 2 miles last night! AND. I kept passing her (and I'm not exactly burning up the road these days). I don't get it. Why the hurry to run a marathon? Shouldn't she be concentrating on some shorter distances for now? She doesn't appear to be particularly athletic or in very good shape at all, wouldn't it be smarter to gain some fitness, a running base, experience in some shorter distance races, maybe a little-bit better speed, etc. before thinking about training for 26.2? The distance is tough enough, but the training required is not to be taken lightly. Sounds like a recipe for injury and burnout, if you ask me, but who am I to rain on anyone's parade? At least she's out there taking the class, so that is a little smarter than trying to do it all on her own, I guess. I wonder if she is planning on continuing on to the next class, once this session is over?

Tonight was another great running class. I am so excited that I was able to do running intervals of 10 minutes! This is huge for me right now. If I can run for 10 minutes without a walk-break, then I can glimpse a future when I may be a runner again someday. I am amazed at how excited I am over this. Taking this class was really a good idea, knowing that each week the class would be moving forward in the length of running intervals has helped to keep me honest. Also, the class time has been non-pressure enough that I never felt intimidated at all. Oddly, I noticed this evening that our group has gotten very small. It seems as if a lot of people have dropped out. Oh well, it's all good for me, I get more personal attention this way.

Don't you hate being called ma'am? Well, I imagine if you're a man you really hate it. But seriously, I hate it, it makes me feel so. damn. old. Bought a couple of t-shirts at Old Navy today and the checkout girl must have said ma'am three times. I wanted to say, "enough already!" I know she was just being respectful, but I would almost have preferred "Yo, bitch!" At least it would have been more appropriate.

Well, I'll make myself feel better by remembering that I was carded at the packy in Massachusetts while trying to buy beer last weekend. I didn't have my ID on me, so Ken had to buy it for me. Heh. I love Massachusetts.

It may be hard to believe but, sometimes I have absolutely nothing to say.

On my way to the gym at lunch, I was hit by a guy on a bicycle, traveling in the wrong direction. Luckily, he was not moving fast at all and so I was not hurt. I somehow managed to grab a hold of his handle bars to prevent him from completely plowing me over, which is a good thing since he did not appear to be making any effort to stop or even slow down at all. The man kept moving along, once I let go of the bike and said, "Sorry, baby" (sorry? baby???). My response was, "Asshole".

Walking back to work after running an errand to Whole Foods, I am handed a coupon for "Flashdancers" Adult Entertainment lounge from one of the guys in aprons who stand all over this neighborhood handing tickets out for this place. Now, what about me made him think that I would be interested in a tittie bar??? Actually, I've been to the bar before, but it was with a bunch of guys... oh nevermind.

I have to say that I was proud to wear my Julia & Joe "Life Marathon" t-shirt to running class tonight. Especially after Shelly-Lynn Glover started class with some effusive talk about the Boston Marathon. I'm happy that I was able to be up in Boston for this special weekend, even if I had to miss the Marathon itself.

What can I say about Julia's and Joe's wedding? What a fun time, what a perfect wedding. Beautiful weather the entire weekend (although the heat on Monday was obviously horrible for the Boston Marathon runners). Everyone stood in a circle (a circle of "love" heh) in the brilliant sunshine around the couple at the Marathon Start Line on Saturday morning to hear the vows and then we all moved on down the street for the pig roast, which was made even more wonderful by the perfect weather. Even Lola got to go. Yes, I actually brought my dog to the wedding. You've got to love a couple who invites a pug to their wedding! Anyway, it was a great day to be outside in the sunshine drinking beer and eating BBQ.

The entire weekend was a lot of fun actually. From the road trip up to Boston with Ellen & Ken, to being able to have my dog with me, to the great dinner that Julia & Joe organized and paid for for family & friends the night before the wedding (where I finally got to meet the famous Amanda), to the wedding and the pig roast and the Dead Runner's Society Dinner on Saturday night, it was such a fun time. Best weekend I've probably had in a couple of years. I had also forgotten how much I love Boston. Great town, I could live there.

By the way, does anyone know who that guy was who was filming my dog right after the wedding ceremony? The guy got right down on the same level with her and spent a lot of time filming her, while I stood at the end of her leash watching. He never introduced himself or explained what he was doing or anything. Weird.

I am feeling more and more alone in my status as a child-free adult these days. In recent years, I've come to the realization that I am never going to have children. Rather than depressing me, this decision has been surprisingly liberating. I've never been very maternal and my thoughts of one day possibly bearing and raising a child were always ambivalent at best and at worst, cause for panic and depression. Once I realized that I didn't have to have a child ever, that my life could be rich in many other ways and in ways that are more interesting and fulfilling to me, a huge weight seemed to slide off of my shoulders. So this is me: Child-Free for Life and happy about it. The problems I am experiencing currently though, is how child and family-biased the World is. Many of my friends are settling in and having children now. Great, go for it, congratulations, I'm happy for you. But I don't necessarily want to be around your kid all the time, or want to only talk about the kid constantly (as an aside: I have to say, most of my friends are pretty good about not doing this, they have plenty of other things to say beyond the latest infinitesimal step forward their kid has taken). As a result, I feel very adrift in my decision. Part of it is social, my friends don't socialize the way they used to. But I think more importantly, it is an attitude thing. This morning I was on the train with Michelle (who does not have children, but wants them someday) and I was lamenting how the "guys" once in a while will go out for a drink on a Friday and yet I'm never invited along because "the girls" are home with the babies (it never used to be guys vs. girls before) and how I feel somehow penalized for others' life choices. I then said something to the effect of, "I need to meet some people who are committed to being child-free." And she looked at me as if I had three heads and said, "Well, that's harsh."

... Is it? I wasn't trying to be harsh, but in all honesty, I am not a "kid person". I never was. I like my friends' kids, I am truly happy for them, especially since this is what they want. But why am I wrong for wanting to find people who have the lifestyle that I want for myself? Just because my friends have made the commitment to have children, does that mean I have to forever-more be on baby watch by default? My friends with children will still be my friends. I just don't want that to become my life as well. I'm not saying that I hate children. I just don't want to be around them all the time. Nor do I want to have to talk about them constantly either. I would like to find some additional friends who share my lifestyle and interests. Why is this wrong?

Have you ever blathered away in a company common area to someone whom you thought was one person, only to turn around and look more fully at that person and realize they are not the person you thought you were talking to? Well, it just happened to me. Here I was yacking away at the water cooler (how cliche) thinking I was talking to a guy in my department and wondering why he wasn't talking to me (am I on a shit list somewhere?) only to turn and look and realize that I don't even know the guy I was talking to. Guy gave a nervous little laugh and then scurried out of there. I think maybe I scared him, although, I don't know why, I was being friendly. Sheesh.

Torrential downpour and thunderstorms... forget running class, I'm going Spinning tonight! AND I'm going to take a subway there.

I never thought I would see it in my lifetime, the return of gaucho pants as a fashion "must have". Although, in my opinion, these are better left in the 70s.

Interesting.

Seems we can perhaps look forward to a Queer Eye for the Straight *Girl* after all. Hmmm...

Yesterday I had a delightful time being in Central Park to walk and to run. It was one of those terrific days that happen all of a sudden when Winter gives up it's grip, and the Cherry Blossoms and Magnolias are just about ready to bloom (you could see the buds gaining color and a little volume, they're just not quite there yet). Lots of people were out enjoying the day, and I saw the gamut of outfits for the weather too. Everything from shorts and tank-tops to down coats, hats and scarves. Me: I was in long running pants, short-sleeve micro-fiber shirt and a running shell (think: windbreaker) which came off during the time I was running. My experience in Central Park was bittersweet however as I miss living next to it so much. This used to be my backyard! I felt a sour hole in the pit of my stomach for much of the time, my angst over this was so large.

I met Ellen & Ken, Harriet and Daniel outside of the Park in the early afternoon, from where we moved on to Brother Jimmy's on Amsterdam Avenue to sit outside in the sun, enjoy the day and some Southern BBQ (as well as some beer). It was a wonderful time.

God, I'm tired. So much for today being a nice, easy, laid-back, relaxing day. I've been really busy at work all day long. So much for my fantasies that people might be allowed to leave early. Not hardly likely. At least not in this department. Sheesh.

I think I'm going to cancel Movie Night with Carolina. Feeling too tired to be social.

Rant of the Day: Men. Why is it, no matter what the size of the man, he always has to take up so much damn space? The brilliant minds at the LIRR have commissioned new trains that were based upon a Japanese model, and as a result, the space on our crowded trains is now even skimpier than before. Great. Add to that, every time a man sits down next to me on one of these trains, he has to sit with his legs spread out, with his elbows jutting out and into my sides, to the point at which I am forced to cross my legs together, push my arms forward to make more room, basically curl myself into as small a package as I possibly can to compensate for the extra space the man commands. Doesn't matter the size of the man (although, of course it becomes more of an issue with a bigger one). I rarely have this problem when a woman sits next to me on the train, even with women who are not exactly svelte. Why as a woman am I forced to make myself smaller, because a man demands a lion's share of space? If I were clever, I could talk about how this is some kind of metaphor for women's position in society (and particularly the work-force, since we ARE talking about a commuter train here) but I'm just not that clever.

Happiness Is: A nice day that is cool and crisp enough to wear a jacket in the morning, yet warm enough that the jacket can be a light-running-shell-windbreaker-style jacket. Bliss.

Have you ever felt so tired that just the routine you have to go through before even getting into bed makes you want to cry? That's the way I felt last night. Just couldn't get to bed soon enough. Slept like a rock and still feel some residual fatigue this morning, but am certainly better than yesterday. I need to get outside and get some fresh air. Luckily, it seems like it's another beautiful day.

Things that Annoy Me: inconsiderate people at the gym. Today I was at the gym at lunchtime and I was using the Xpressline weights system that is designed for people (like me) who don't have a lot of time, but want to fit in a weights workout. So there are designated times when you are not supposed to linger on these specific machines and you are supposed to keep an eye out for others who are using them in succession (which is how they are meant to be implemented). So what do two unrelated guys do to me while I am making my way down the Xpressline? Jump on to the machine directly ahead of the machine I was currently on at the time. Two separate guys at two different times. I was so annoyed! There is a big sign that states the rules and there are also other machines all over the floor that they could have used. And both of these guys were meandering around the weights area so randomly too. It certainly did not look like the machines they chose to cut me off from were part of any kind of specific routine for either of them. I hate having to backtrack. Bastards.

Other than that, my lunchtime workout was enjoyable.

I am so damn tired...

I was up all night last night coughing. Frustrating under any circumstance, but especially last night as I had been so exhausted already. I finally gave up, got up and ready and came to work early. I think I'll try to leave here a little early today and go up to Central Park and try to run again a little bit. I felt terrible that I hadn't done any running between last week's running class and yesterday. It's only going to get harder to keep up, so I really have to make sure I do my "homework". Surprisingly, last night I wasn't terrible however. There were plenty of people in the class who "cheated" and had to walk during the running intervals, even on the very first one. And (if I'm going to be honest with myself), if I hadn't been in class, I know I would never have made myself run intervals of that length. I would have given up and walked far sooner than we did with class last night. So I think class is a really good thing for me in this respect. I am too stubborn to give in, even when I feel like I'm going to fall over with the effort. heh. Next week will be intervals of six minutes, so I really need to buckle down and start putting in the effort.

Seen tonight in Central Park: Man running on the Park Drive in running tights, running shoes and a full-puff down parka. Er, it was like 53 degree out. I mean, I was only out running for my short intervals with the Beginner's Running Class and I was wearing running tights, short-sleeve coolmax top and a very thin running shell (and there are plenty who would think that is over-dressed). Too funny.

And one other thing, why am I so exhausted today? I can barely keep my eyes open. I need some interesting work to do.

Good Lord, is it ever frickin' cold out there! 30 degrees and windy as hell on April 6th. Guess we're not going to have a Spring this year. Again.

Ho Hum. Back at work. I can't even remember what I was working on... what time is lunch?

Took Lola for a 4+ mile walk this afternoon to Forest Hills. Walked there via Queens Blvd. and back through Forest Hills Gardens. During the course of our walk we saw exactly two dogs. Two (2). Dogs. In over four miles. Weird.

I had some weird and vivid dreams last night that, among other things, had me involved in some nefarious scheme or another that required hasty escapes through an unfamiliar subway system and a hideout in some huge and creepy illegal apartment in an industrial building. At one point I remember a scene where I was looking out of the window of this apartment along with one of my partners in crime (nameless, faceless person whom I did not recognize from my real life) and we witnessed some bizarre happening where there was an escaped water wheel attached to a long coat rack on wheels from a restaurant that went careening down the street and unhindered by any human (hey, it was a dream, what can I say). But I remember at that point in my dream turning to the person who was witnessing this event with me and saying, "I'm going to have to remember to blog about this."

Things that Annoy Me: My stupid, inconsiderate, asshole upstairs neighbors (who do not have RUGS) that insist on letting "wittle pwecious" 1.5 yro BRAT run around all the time, but especially at SIX O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING. The worst is the freaking kid running around at 6:00 AM on a SATURDAY MORNING (which is what happened this past Saturday). It sounds like someone running across a drum -- without exaggeration. And all the other times they stomp around (many times with shoes on) or drag furniture around or "Wittle Pweshus" drops or throws (repeatedly) toys or whatever on the bare, hard-wood floors. And I am not even going to go into the screaming tantrums I can hear from my apartment. I mean, what kind of people live in a studio apartment with a kid anyway??? I've been told that they all sleep in one bed. Freaks.