Another Run

I went out for another mid-day run today and found it incredibly hot & humid. Especially humid. I believe that we’re due for some thunderstorms later today. Anyway, I wasn’t much in the mood for running at all and I was even slightly depressed when I started (really, I was just a little overwhelmed by a new project that I’m being sucked into). I felt extremely heavy and ungainly and unable to move myself very effectively. I decided to keep it as easy as possible and so I saved most of the running for the trail parts, most of which are in the woods and out of the sun. I walked more on these sections than I normally do, but I did still manage a fair proportion of running. All-in-all, I covered about 2.5 miles, give or take.

Toadstool Alert:

At one point during the run, I came across a bunch of very large, bright orange toadstools. That was new.

Other People:

I went out later than usual today (and let me tell you, 12:30 PM is NOT the time of day to go out when it’s hot like it is today). And of course I saw a lot of people out and about. On my way out to the trails I passed a soccer game underway and on my way back I passed a softball game and a volleyball game, no one was playing basketball however, and I couldn’t see as far as the tennis courts. I certainly have no desire to participate in any of these activities (I’m happy enough with my running routes, thank you), but I think it’s lovely that it’s available for people who do. I did see a few people out on the fire road and on the service road behind the campus. But then I was finishing up the backend of one of my favorite trails and encountered a couple of casual walkers complete in business attire. GAH! My sanctuary has been breached by oxford shirts and Dockers! Stay off my trails and stick to the walkways! I got back to the gym and the locker room was PACKED with women. I really dislike dealing with the locker room even in the best of circumstances, but it was so crowded and I was hot and not cooling down any time soon, and there were at least a couple of blow dryers going too – UGH! Misery.

Anyway, overall it was not my best or happiest effort. But I have to say I did feel much better after it was all done and my little depression was pretty much gone too. Running is the best stress reliever that I know of. Even a bad run will make you feel great afterwards.

Another Trail Run

I managed to get out and do another trail run today. It was hotter than yesterday, but the humidity still seemed to be relatively low, so I was pretty happy. My run was okay, I’m still a little frustrated with my slow progress, but running has always been this way for me, even when I was younger and weighed considerably less. It just takes a long time for me to get to a solid place where I can do good mileage and run with minimal or no walk-breaks. So I have to keep telling myself that I have to be patient. It’s almost becoming a mantra with me, with the weight loss too. Even though I’ve lost (to date) about 43 lbs, the last couple of weeks it seems to have slowed down to a crawl. Even though overall 43 lbs sounds great, I’m having trouble thinking past the last two weeks. I have to be patient, I have to be patient. It’s such a long, frustrating process ARGH!

Well anyway, the run went relatively well even considering my frustration. There was one trail section that I’ve done many times before. And always before I’ve had to take multiple walk breaks. Today I only needed two on this section. One break because I needed it and the other because there was a new fallen & rotted tree blocking the path. Both times the breaks were brief, so I was pretty happy with that and could feel that I’ve made progress. I felt that I also ran more on a more technical trail section too. I ran through some of the somewhat hilly and rocky pieces that in the past I would have walked through. Lastly, I did my lovely, short trail section where I had my “success” yesterday and, again, I was able to run the entire thing without stopping. This time it was after I had been running awhile, so by the time I got to the end I was gasping & gasping for air. If there had been a bench or something I would have sat myself down for a bit. I really felt that one. Anyway, after that I was pretty much done, so I walked the trail in reverse and headed on back. Overall I did about 3 miles, but about ½ a mile of that was a walking cool-down at the end.

The Un-Friendly Runner

I was surprised to see more runners out today than I expected to and I didn’t really enjoy that so much. One of the things that I find appealing about running (especially on trails) is the aloneness of it. I’ve never been one for team sports, I’m a classic introvert and running is just perfect for introspection and for challenging yourself, just for you and not worrying about what anyone else is doing. But runners tend to be a friendly sort, and most like to nod, or say “hi” or otherwise try to share the experience. I tend to be that unfriendly runner who wants to ignore your presence, I like to go on with the illusion that I’m out there alone. Most runners HATE people like me. If you stick around enough running message boards or discussion lists, you’ll come across a complaint about the “unfriendly” runner eventually. If I wanted to be nice and socialize I would play soccer or volleyball or something (either of which would instantly send me hurtling back through time to the most horrifying school flashbacks imaginable). Ironically, I used to love to run in Central Park in NYC and people watch while I did so. I just didn’t want to have to talk to or acknowledge any of the people there -- which is actually perfect behavior in NYC as nobody there expects anyone to say “hi” for Heavens sake. Yet anywhere else my anti-social running attitude makes me feel a little guilty, I guess I should just fake it (and sometimes I do), but I'd really just rather not see people while I'm out there.

A Good Run

I had a pretty good run today and that was a bit of a surprise. It’s actually always a surprise to me when a run seems to go relatively well, I’m not sure why. I guess because I still feel like I am so new (again) to this and since I’m also carting around more weight than is really ideal for running (for my frame anyway). Additionally, with trying to lose weight by cutting calories while also starting up a running program, I am walking a fine line between cutting enough calories to make a difference on the scale, while also eating enough to fuel my runs. There is a reason why lots of people who train for marathons find that they actually GAIN weight. Their bodies either scream for more calories by making them ravenous, or they feel like they are burning so many calories that they’re entitled to eat a lot more (or some combination of the two). All you have to do is log onto the RunnersWorld.com forums and you can read many laments on the subject. This was not my experience when marathon training, however. I actually lost weight. But I was also running in the mornings and spinning in the evenings in those days, and I am also one of those people who tend to be more careful about what she eats when exercising. If I’m taking the trouble & effort to fling sweat around, I don’t like to mess that up too much by ruining the effort with too much junk food. It’s when I fall off the exercise wagon that I tend to run into the most trouble. Anyway, this time around the food part of the weight loss equation has taken precedence with me and so I know that my daily calorie allotment is on the low side. I think it would be fine if I was just walking, but when I add running to the equation, I tend to run out of steam. And that almost always seems to happen right around the two mile mark. I’m not sure how much of that is lack of conditioning and how much is the lower calorie thing, it’s probably some combination of the two.

Anyway, so it was a glorious day. The humidity has been chased out (at least temporarily) by the series of severe storms we suffered through here in New Hampshire last week and through the weekend (as an aside, I sure was glad that I hadn’t planned a vacation for last week, it would have been a complete dud). So, it was sunny with low humidity and the mosquitoes weren’t as bad as they have been. I ran a couple of my usual trails and was thrilled to find that I was able to run one of the shorter ones without having to stop to walk once! That was the first time I’ve been able to do that. It is only about .2 miles, so nothing to be too impressed about, but it has uphills and downhills and plenty of roots & rocks & a few logs to jump over. So, I was pretty pleased with myself. I then did my trail with all the big uphills, but the nice thing about it is that it has some lovely downhills and flat bits down the other side that are just wonderful to run through and it’s a great reward for all the suffering you have to do on the first half of that trail. And then coming back, I decided to run my little .2 mile trail in reverse back to the fire road. This time I had to take one walk break in the middle (by then, I had exceeded my two-mile energy limit), but did manage to run the rest of it. All-together I did just a hair shy of three miles, I’d say. Maybe 2.8 miles? Somewhere around that distance. Over all, It felt pretty good.

Things I Love

Burt's Bees lip balm. I'm one of those people who absolutely have to have lip balm on hand at all times. Always. I guess you can say that I'm addicted. And my very favorite lip balm is Burt's Bees -- bliss! I was in a store a week or so ago and discovered a Burt's Bees tinted lip balm! Imagine my excitment to find a product that combines that wonderful lip balm comfort with my girly desire for pinky, shimmery lips. Love!

Mad Men

I discovered a series last week that had previously somehow passed by my notice.
"Mad Men" is an original series on AMC (who even knew that AMC does original series? I know that I didn't). The series takes place in circa 1960 and is about a bunch of slick advertising execs on Madison Avenue. I know, I know, you're thinking, 'Eh', I thought the same thing. But I was intrigued because it's apparently been nominated for a shitload of Emmys, so I thought that it might be worth checking out. First I placed it in my Netflix queue (the first season is available on DVD and the second season starts this Sunday!) But then I did some searching around and found out that they were having a "Mad Men" marathon this past Sunday, every episode from the first season shown back-to-back. So I recorded them ALL on the DVR and have been working my way through them this week. I have to say that it's brilliant! It is SOOOOOOO sexist and I find that extremely disturbing, but it also adds such an element to the drama (and, yes, comedy) that I find myself completely riveted, sometimes just staring at the screen with my mouth gaping open. I don't doubt that the world was every bit as sexist in the bad old days as showcased in these episodes, so watching this is almost like being an archaeologist discovering a long, lost society or something. Like Atlantis. heh. Oh the other thing is, they all constantly drink & smoke throughout the show too, I find myself both completely horrified and engrossed at the same time. The story lines are all unique and so outside the usual standard boilerplate of TV content. It's completely refreshing and fun to watch, I have not seen even a mediocre episode yet. So great to discover something so delicious smack dab in the middle of a dull Summer filled with repeats and horrible contest/games shows and reality TV.

On a Roll

I managed to get outside and run the trails again today. I took a different series of them and did about three miles (distance estimated by using my pedometer). It was another swampy day, but again, the temps weren't quite as bad as they had been a couple of days ago. Well, when I say that the temp wasn't as "bad", I mean that it was about 80 degrees with about 90% humidity, rather than 90 degrees with about 90% humidity (just so as we're clear). Some of the trail is pretty rugged and I had to be very careful with foot placement since with all the rain and moist weather we've had, the stretches of slab granite and slate embedded in the paths can be very treacherous, those rocks get pretty slick when they're wet and it's easy to forget that the surfaces aren't always just dirt, pine needles and leaves. Still, this is the kind of stuff that makes trail running fun and interesting! So, another workout day down, I'm once again on a roll towards building some exercise consistency.

I had a surprisingly good run ...

today. I wanted to try a run outside, since I did treadmill intervals yesterday. But, geez, was it murky and nasty out today. It took a lot of convincing, but I managed to get myself out there and I'm glad that I did. I ran about 2.5 of trail loop, one of the steeper trails that I do. I had to walk some of the steeper hills, but I was able to run more of it than I expected to be able to do. It was very humid, but I think the temps were lower than they were yesterday, so it was actually somewhat bearable. We've had so much heavy humidity around here lately that there are all kinds of crazy toadstools growing out in the woods. I mean, huge, bright red ones the size of salad plates, mushrooms of all kinds of strange shapes & colors & sizes. I almost felt like I should be running through Middle Earth or the Land of Oz or something. Bizarre. Anyway, it ended up being quite a nice run, very satisfying. And I was even happier to have gotten it done when the torrential rain started about an hour or so later.

Trying to get back into it

I managed to start the new week off with a workout. In my former running life, my training week was always Sunday to Saturday. I liked to break the weekend up like that in case I have an off one, that way it gets split between two. Oh the mind games I have to play with fitness stuff. Anyway, it's been so stinking oppressive this weekend, today was downright murky (finally, the thunderstorms have just started) so it wasn't conducive to doing anything outside. So it was back to the treadmill for me. I did three miles of running intervals, followed with one mile of brisk walking on a higher incline. I found my energy really waning in the last ten minutes of the running part of the workout, I think because I ate a very small lunch today and hadn't had a lot of water either. Plus, I haven't been consistently working out for a couple of weeks now, so I'm sure that was also a factor. Anyway, I'm pretty happy with it and I feel like I've started my week off right. Now I have to keep it up for the rest of the week. One workout down, five more to go (for the week).

Clothes, Glorious Clothes

Since I've lost about 40 lbs or so, I have of course found myself in the position where all of my old clothes no longer fit. I'd say that I'm down a little more than two sizes at the moment. Of course, since I still have weight to lose and I'm still in the middle of this process, I also don't want to invest a ton of money on lots of new clothes in what will hopefully only be a transitional size. Luckily I've been able to find a lot Summer stuff on sale at some of my favorite online stores (as well as Target and TJ Max), so I've been able to fill out my wardrobe enough to last me a good couple of months or so, without having to break the bank.

With the weight loss, I am now more interested in cuter clothes and in trying to look nice, even to run out for an errand or something. This morning I had an appointment and since I was already out & about, I decided to make a stop in the mall to do some browsing, something I haven't really done much of in many years. I browsed through a few stores realizing that I really didn't need anything, so I wasn't very intent, but I definitely felt different in these stores than I have in a long, long time. Used to be I would feel embarrassed or even almost apologetic for myself when searching through a store for something that would fit my ass. Now I felt almost cute and that I could walk into pretty much any store there and find plenty of stuff that would fit me. I just didn't really want anything. Anyway, it was a good feeling and one that I hadn't had in a while. It's amazing what losing some weight and becoming more physically active can do for your frame of mind. I feel so much more attractive and positive these days.

Boredom can be dangerous

I did a weird thing over the weekend. I was kind of bored and was doing some internet surfing and decided to go browse the Match.com site. Used to be you could browse ads in your zipcode without committing yourself to a membership, but it appears they've changed their policies and you have to now give them an email address to get onto their site. In addition to that, they apparently no longer accept free internet email addresses (such as Yahoo or Gmail or whatever) and there is no way I'm registering with Match.com with my work address, so I gave up on that. So next I went to EHarmony which allowed me to register with a Gmail address and took me immediately to this involved and very long questionaire. I shrugged my shoulders figuring I had nothing better to do and filled it out. Well. Since I did all this, my inbox has been flooded with matches and requests for communication and I haven't even joined the stupid program! So now I'm stuck with not really knowing what I want to do. I was thinking of maybe joining Match or EHarmony once I got closer to my weight loss goals, but I really don't think I'm quite ready yet. But in the meantime I'm receiving all these general profiles and requests for communication from men and since I'm not a member, I can't even respond or see their pictures or read anything beyond the most generic general canned profile descriptions. But I'm not ready to meet men! ACK! I should have just done some internet shopping and over-spent on stuff that I don't need like I usually do when I'm bored. Sheesh.

1st Post-Surgery Workout

So I decided to try a real workout tonight. I figured that I would keep it simple so I just got on the treadmill for a little over 30 minutes and did some slower running intervals. It was hard enough, but not impossible, thankfully. Running causes this deep ache at the site of my surgery, but none of the incision sites seem to be at all bothered, so that is good. I ended up doing one minute running intervals followed by one minute fast walking intervals, so I never had a break of more than a minute (and even those one minute breaks were kept at a brisk pace, so they were active rests). That seemed to work pretty well, so I think I can start some regular running again at this stage. I'm going to keep the intervals slower for this week at least, but other than that I guess I can say that I'm back in the running game. Not too bad really, only one week post-surgery, I can't complain about that.

Quick Weight Loss Update

As of this morning, according to my bathroom scale, I have lost 40 lbs since I began this journey back in March. I'm pretty happy about where I am right at the moment and am hoping now that the surgery is behind me that I can jump back into the fitness part of this equation very soon. I did take one of the dogs for a two-mile walk today and was surprised to feel some achy pain where my gall bladder used to be. It took me a bit by surprise really, I've been feeling so great sitting around and running out to do errands, I really wasn't expecting to feel much discomfort. Anyway, it wasn't bad enough to make me want to stop walking or anything, but it makes me think that I might not be ready to try some running this week. We'll see, I'll probably give it a shot at some point anyway.

Non-Scale Victory

I went to my hair stylist yesterday to get my highlights touched up and she said that I'm looking really terrific these days. And now with refreshed highlights, probably even better -- Ha.

Odd

I did the strangest thing today, I bought a skirt. Odd. I haven't even worn a skirt in years & years. I don't know what possessed me really. Oh well, it was only $12 or something. And who knows? Maybe I'll actually wear it.

Hunger

Well, my appetite has officially returned. That didn't last long!

Feeling MUCH Better!

I feel SOOOOOOOO much better this morning, closing in on almost normal, I'd say. Belly is still pretty sore and I'm really kind of scared to start peeling the bandages off, even though they told me that I could by now. I just don't think that I'm ready to see what's under them. But I took my first shower this morning (I just washed my hair in the sink yesterday) and I feel pretty clear-headed. I can take a deep breath without it hurting too much, but if I cough, that still hurts. Anyway, I think all the sleep I had Wednesday - Thursday and last night really helped. I still have to wear really loose clothing, because of the belly soreness, but a lot of the bloat seems to be gone now. The scale said that I am now only up about .5 lb from my pre-surgery weight, so it's getting there. Maybe I'll even try a walk later today.

WTF?

A very strange thing happened today. During one of the brief stints of time where I was actually awake and sitting in my living room, my door bell rang. Once I was able to get the dogs calmed down and squeezed myself out the door to see what was going on, I saw this huge delivery truck backed up to my garage with two guys hauling at this enormous box. The one guy came over with a yellow delivery slip with my name and address on it and told me that he had a furniture delivery for me from Target. What??? I also saw on the slip instructions to leave the ginormous box if no one was home. I told them that I had not ordered any furniture and that I was going to refuse delivery. He then asked if anyone else could have ordered it, and I pointed to the dogs pressed against the glass storm door and said, "not unless you think one of those four dogs could have." So they rolled their big cargo door closed and drove away. I can't even imagine what I would have done had I been asleep or something when they came. They would have left that humongous, and no doubt extremely heavy, box in front of my garage and I wouldn't have been able to move it at all, being two days post-surgery and all. My God.

The Big Weenie

Ugh, I just wish that I felt better already! I'm so swollen and bloated and sore. My throat is sore and my belly button incision hurts like a mother! And I still haven't really slept. I know I'm a big baby, but I'm used to feeling healthy. I think I'm going to try and skip the pain meds, I think that's part of what is making me feel lousy. I'm going to take some Tylenol PM tonight instead I think. Maybe it'll also help me sleep.

Sleepless

It’s the day after my surgery and I haven’t had more than two or three hours of sleep in total. I thought that I was going to come home yesterday and just crash! And that I would then need long periods of sleep for the next 24 – 48 hours. Well, not so much, at least not so far. I wasn’t at all tired yesterday, I finally went to bed around 11 and just laid awake all night long. Finally at around 3 AM, I got up and came downstairs and put on a movie and just zoned out in the dark with the movie on. I think I finally dozed off sometime after 5 AM, but then was awake again by 7:30. WTF? The pain came on last night too. The incisions in my belly aren’t too bad, pretty sore and I want to be careful not to strain the area too much, but it’s not horrible. But the worst of the pain last night was where the actual surgery had occurred (where the gall bladder had been removed). The pain feels much like a very sharp side stitch that doesn’t go away (only in the area of my upper torso, sort of to the right, under the rib cage). But still, it’s a fraction of the pain I was experiencing when I was having one of those attacks that I had been suffering through. And even this morning that surgery pain doesn’t seem as bad as it was last night, so I’m hoping that that means it’s beginning to subside some. Lastly, I have sharp pain in my shoulders. The nurses at the hospital forewarned me about this (and I’m glad that they did, so at least I know what it is). When they do the laparoscopic surgery, they have to fill your abdomen with air so that they can see and move around, and it bloats you and the air that gets trapped can travel (oddly) to your shoulders and get stuck up there, causing pain. So I know what it is anyway, what I don’t know, however, is how long it should last! (Of course I forgot to ask). I mean, how long can you expect air to be trapped in your shoulders? It’s got to dissipate sometime. Lastly, I stepped on the scale this morning and I was up 4 lbs! From yesterday! I mean, I know it’s all fluid retention and bloat, but … GAH!

Home

Well, I'm home from he hospital and am feeling pretty freaking good, all things concerned. I just have a little discomfort, mild pain, but nothing really terrible. So, here I sit watching movies with all my dogs surrounding and cozying up to me. And my heinous gall bladder attacks should be a thing of the past. I've got to say, I'm feeling pretty content right about now.

Fabulous News

I just received word that
the Boxer rescue group is going to let me adopt Mojo after all! I am so happy and excited, I can't even convey it properly. They told me that they are going to be making an exception to their rules to allow this, so I feel especially lucky.

The Wrench in the Works

As I mentioned previously, I’ve been pretty happy with the progress that I’ve made so far with working out, watching my diet, getting in shape and losing weight (weight loss to date is approximately 37 lbs). I have some momentum now, my attitude is much more positive and focused on activity and health & fitness and I’ve been sincerely pretty happy. The wrench in the works to this recent lifestyle change, however, is a health issue that has developed with me starting in, oh about, the end of April or so.

It all started one day at work while I was on a phone meeting. I started feeling some mild discomfort that grew until I was actually in a lot of pain with pressure (in the center of my lower chest, upper stomach area), could hardly breathe, and felt like I was both going to both pass out and throw up at the same time. I thought that I was having a heart attack. And all I could think was, ‘just great. I finally decide to take control of my life and get healthy and it’s too late and I’m going to die anyway.’ (I think that I had lost about 20 or so lbs at that stage). So, I went down to the security office at work, put my head down on the counter and said, “I think I’m having a heart attack.” They hustled me into the office and whipped out an oxygen mask, started taking vital statistics and called EMS. Of course, right around the time that EMS came, I started feeling better and of course then started feeling really embarrassed for causing such a fuss. EMS convinced me that I should run down to see my doctor, however, to rule out that anything particularly dire was wrong. Unfortunately, my primary doctor was unavailable on such short notice, so I got passed to a new colleague with whom I just did not hit it off. She had the nurses give me an EKG that they had to do five or more times, never really figuring out how to do it properly. Then this doctor put me in a tail spin by telling me that she didn’t like my EKG and that I needed to go to the ER (she was ready to call an ambulance!). She then made a comment about the fact that I was visibly upset. I lost it at that point, practically yelling at her, “Upset? Of COURSE I’m upset! You just told me that there may be something wrong with my heart, I think I’m entitled to be a little upset, I really don’t think you should make me feel bad about that.” (She then had the audacity to tell the ER doctor I ended up seeing that there was a possibility that I was having a panic attack. I mean, WTF???) Anyway, I drove myself to the ER where they were able to take me right away, they did the whole host of tests (EKG, heartrate monitoring, blood tests, chest x-rays) and determined that the attack that I had had was NOT heart-related (TG). The ER doctor said that the issue was most likely a gall bladder or GERD (Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease, basically, a fancy name for severe heart burn) issue.

Well, I had a second attack the following week and so went to see my doctor. She wanted to lean towards GERD and prescribed Prilosec and sent me for an abdominal ultrasound. That did confirm that I had gall stones, but my doctor still was skeptical that they were causing me these severe attacks, I think because even though I have stones, the gall bladder itself was not distended or compromised or irritated, etc. (if you let this go too long, it can get pretty bad, I guess, it can get infected, the walls become thick and it can even burst). Anyway, after experiencing two more attacks over Memorial Day Weekend, I called my doctor’s office again for a referral to a GI specialist. Of course the specialist wasn’t available until July, so I was pretty much in a holding pattern. That is, until Wednesday night/Thursday morning, June 25th / 26th. The start of a bad attack woke me at about midnight and kept me awake in screaming pain all night long. Finally things subsided enough so that I was able to drive myself to the ER at about 5:30 AM. Once there I went through the usual labs and the ER doctor became alarmed because my liver levels were elevated to 4x what they were a few weeks before. He worried that I might have a blockage of the common bile duct, which can be pretty bad, apparently. So I was whisked off for another ultrasound where they were able to determine that the common duct was most likely okay, but the gall bladder had “a bazillion little stones”. The ER guy said that this is something that they see a lot and that my attacks even sound “classic”. He had no doubt that these attacks were completely gall bladder-related. To be frank, I’m a little relieved, everything I had read about GERD didn’t hold out much hope that the condition is ever really satisfactorily treated and most people end up living with a chronic, and sometimes debilitating, condition. Anyway, so the ER doctor called my doctor and convinced her finally about the gall bladder theory and I was set up with a surgeon with whom to follow-up. That happened last week and he’s now scheduled me for surgery on Tuesday morning! That’s Tuesday, as in, the day after tomorrow! ACK!

I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t freaking out a bit about the thought of surgery. I’m actually being a bit of a weenie about it. I don’t know why I’m so scared, I’ve had surgery before. But the biggest thing for me now is the wrench that this might throw into my working out and weight-loss efforts. The sessions with the personal trainer are going to have to stop for at least four weeks and the surgeon seemed to think that I was not going to be comfortable running for a couple of weeks either. He seemed to think that I was a little strange for asking how soon that I could run, that this seemed to be my biggest concern. He also said that I seem to be in pretty good shape, so that I should bounce back and recover quickly. It made me wonder, if I am the picture of health & fitness to him, what shape are his usual patients in? Scary thought. The other odd thing was that he suggested that I take two weeks off of work. That seemed pretty extensive to me, but he said that he likes to be conservative in case the patient doesn’t recover quickly, he wants people to have made the right prior arrangements with their jobs. But since I can work from home, I figure that I can play it by ear.

So, that’s the whole, long, sad story. I’ve wanted to blog about it before now, but I had also hoped that it was all going to go away. Since I now have a definitive diagnosis and it looks like it’s going to be a factor in my life for about a month, it seems like a noteworthy thing to write about. Maybe I can head off any roadblocks in the weight-loss area by writing about my frustrations with the recovery and my cravings for comfort food.